Christmas 2002

We don’t mean to make your Christmas blue,

But we wanted to update you on our 2002.

And we hope this annual spam

Won’t automatically end up in the garbage can.

 

There isn’t enough room for us to sing

The praises of a Disney World trip this spring

But everyone’s demands keep mountin’

To tell of our ride on Splash Mountain.

 You see Granny Audrey is tough to scare.

Unless she thinks you plan to muss her hair.

And her tongue really started to lash

When she saw why the mountain is called Splash

 

The next week, if you please,

Was spent in the Florida Keys.

Some might prefer to have gone golfin’,

But we went swimming with dolphins.

 

Here, about Neil’s knee, is the skinny.

He was in the clear to ski, play tennis and shinny

Since all this hasn’t changed his ability to skate.

Perhaps at hockey he isn’t all that great.

 

Here is a story you’ll really like.

Wanda took a course on how to mountain bike.

While it did clear up some downhill confusions.

Several falls resulted in magnificent contusions.

 

You must know of Kayla our loveable mutt.

Well, her hair hasn’t come back since her spring cut

So that people don’t think we are Samoyed owners careless.

We tell them her breed is Siberian Hairless.

 

Glub, glub, glub.

The girls have joined a swim club.

Now their breast and back stroke

Are nothing of which to joke.

 

Once again we went to the coast

Where we enjoy our vacations the most.

The island called Saltspring

Is the latest for which we have a thing.

 

Heather is fast approaching 5 feet.

Which is really quite neat.

But as she grows and grows

She has begun to wear Mum’s clothes.

 

Hannah has really begun to flower.

As she reads Harry Potter by the hour.

Soon she too will start to probe

The depths of Wanda’s wardrobe.

 

As you may very well know

Fernie has next to no snow.

Let’s cheer on the coming of the Grizz,

And hope he hasn’t lost his fizz.

 

Well that’s the end of our Christmas epistle.

And you probably want to whistle

On reaching the end of his literary gristle

And news of all the Watson drivel.

2007 Christmas poem

Whether for this you love us or hate us

You noticed the poem took a one year hiatus

We are back this year, in force

With rhymes both fine and coarse

 

While there aren’t exactly any new faces

It seems like it since the girls no longer have braces.

That, however, isn’t the end of all of the pain

Since for this Mum and Dad still are a’ payin’

 

This year we went kayaking for another loop

Through the Broken Islands Group

Dang! Everyone one became a fan

Of Gomer’s best gal Dana Ann.

 

Despite worries about if she could keep up

Outside of a double kayak set-up

Heather for the first time paddled solo

Instead we had to implore her to go slow-o

 

Everyday when we would set out

Hannah would slip the word out

That when we return in a year

She too wants to use the single gear

 

So the family with whom we paddle

Are under pressure to get back in the saddle

And review all of their camping stuff

To make sure it is totally up to snuff.

 

Hannah showed lots of soccer smarts

Playing for the Chinooks Benefica and Hearts

Heather also had a really good season of socca

Playing for a team called the Chinooks Boca.

 

To ski even more, we decided to buy a boat

The best we can say is that it does float

The manufacturer called it an American Eagle

Its initial behaviour was a little less than regal.

 

After some repairs to the motor

Doing things such as replacing the rotor

Along with a new marine battery

The comments sounded more like flattery.

 

Wanda ran a marathon in Sacramento

In hopes of a very special memento

She didn’t fulfill her Boson qualifying quest

But by thirteen minutes she set a personal best

 

As a Junior High School graduation gift

Heather went sailing on the Pacific Swift

Up the Inside Passage from Sidney to Port Hardy.

For her it was a week long party.

 

Of course we are ready to start skiing

And a lot of internet time is spent on seeing

In an effort for us to be knowing

When it is going to really start snowing.

 

Wanda billed more than an hour or two

Consulting at a company named Caribou

She is ready to again hang out her shingle

And wait for the phone to begin to jingle.

 

Now that our labradoodle has turned three

We think we are really beginning to see

That she has, at least a little bit, settled down

And acts like less of a lovable clown

 

She will still swim for hours, given a chance

And on long walks loves to bounce and prance

Who do we think we are kidding?

She still only occasionally does our bidding.

 

Neil, late in November last fall,

Went to a hockey tournament in Montreal

The experience was really quite a blast

Despite the team coming in dead last

 

The other news he has worth confiding

Is that he is keeping up his bicycle riding

And everyday he really tries and tries

To fit in some worthwhile exercise.

 

And that ends this year in review

All that is left is for us to wish you

The best of the Season’s Greetings

Till our next poetic meeting.

2008 Christmas poem

If Christmas music on your nerves does grate,

As we reach the final weeks of 2008

The Watsons are here to add to your woes

With this year’s compendium in bad prose.

 

Heather had her first experience at working.

Encroaching adulthood continues to be lurking.

She spent the entire week of Stampede

Serving lots of cowpokes their feed.

 

A lot of kids go to swim at summer camp.

Hannah prefers frozen water; that scamp.

She went glacier skiing at Mount Farnham.

These kids are lucky, gosh darn ‘em.

 

As you may very well already know

This season in Fernie there was lots of snow.

Hannah was the only person this did rankle

Because she was at home with a broken ankle.

 

Jim and Audrey came for a month long visit

Their first trip to the West Coast was exquisite.

While we did our best to show ‘em

How this could be their new home.

 

Heather went to sea once again with SALTS

And the trip had similarly enjoyable results.

Sailing from Port Hardy to Ucluelet

Was another trip she will never forget.

 

The rest of us went kayaking near Johnstone Strait

Sightings of orcas to hopefully relate.

Though none were seen, their presence was known

By hearing them spouting and on the hydrophone.

 

James and Robin with Spirit Of The West

Are guides we would describe as the best.

And we enjoyed meeting the rest of the crew

Amongst them Welsh Pen & Sel and Aussie Drew.

 

And best wishes to Catherine and Patrick all the way

From the Packers home in good old Green Bay.

And Torontonians, Ernest and young William

From the province whose flower is the trillium.

 

We had a great time spending the hours

Telling stories and eating Dino-sours

Thanks to you the trip didn’t fail

Even though we didn’t see a single whale.

 

Heather was busy with soccer again this year

Into the opposition hearts she instilled fear

Whether as a very aggressive defender

Or as a surprisingly good goaltender.

 

Hannah played for the Chinooks Hearts

Though the weather caused more fits than starts.

When she did get a chance to take to the field

The other team’s defenders had to yield.

 

It may have seemed like a lot to maneuver

But the extended Watson family met in Vancouver.

To witness brother Tony’s eldest son

Marry the lovely and lucky Alison.

 

All of Alex’s future in-laws did wilt

At the Watson men dressed in the kilt.

This seems to happen time and again

When we celebrate our heritage Caledonian.

 

The girls were all dressed up for the wedding

Images of the future their parents are dreading.

Turning lots of head though dressed like young ladies

These girls are no longer our babies.

 

With that the five of us will call it a day.

We seem to have run out of things to say.

Next year we’ll be back with news of adventures.

That will make you spit out your dentures.

Christmas poems online

For several (16 I think) I have been writing poems as a way to let everyone know what was up with us over th eprevious year.  The main reason I have continued to write them is becuase it seems that our friends and family have looked forward to them.  Strange as it may seem.  A big problem is keeping them all together.  I realized that by copying to this blog it can act as an online back-up.  The 2008 poem will be the first one up.

A son of the circus

I didn't have anything new on the go so I picked A Son Of The Circus by John Irving off the shelf. I have read this a couple of times in the past. I have found it worthy of re-reading because it is, in my opinion, Irving's most entertaining effort. Not his most profound. That honour goes to A Prayer For Owen Meany

But if you are in the mood for a who done it that goes well beyond the regular shoddy fare of this genre, this book is for you. The murder is used as the mainline upon which several lines with hooks are strung. As is always the case with Irving the book is replete with references, symbolism and word games. Primary among the latter is the name of the protagonist. Darruwalla is an interesting play on the Indian method of designating the operator of a certain machine or function. E.G.: taxi-wallah is a term for cab driver.

An interesting review can be found here.

I recommended this to the wife of the company president at the Christmas party this weekend. I forgot that some parts are very sexually explicit as this is a method he uses to explore sexual identity and the awakening of Farrokh Daruwalla. Perhaps I shouldn't have done that. I guess I will find out shortly.

The provenance of this blog's name

It is a tribute both to Peter Gzowski, Heather Scott (the girl who won the contest. See this tribute from her Dad here) and the zen aspect to Canada. Part of the wonder of our country is that you can't quite pin it down. It is sort of like describing the perfect wine. You can't pin it down but you know it when you taste it.

David Hein and Home Routes

My wife and I had a wonderful evening of music and socializing at a friends house last night. Our friends hosted a concert by David Hein in their basement through the Home Routes program.

David is a very engaging entertainer who writes amusing songs. My favourite was Victoria which should be on his next album. I missed a bit of his show because I had to pop out to pick up my daughter so I did miss a few songs. He is also a graphic artist and has a precis of his career in comic form. I strongly recommend you go see him if you get a chance. A neighbour is hosting him at their house next week and we are thinking of going to see him again.

The Home Routes program helps organize just such shows in a circuit throughout Canada. I recommend you look into it if you enjoy live music. The concept is sort of like a standardization if the concept of the traveling minstrels. As a child, my parents had a recent immigrant friend from Scotland perform at our house to establish his musical career. It is great to see other musicians afforded this opportunity.